Choose who you are going to be, then make it happen.

Warning – I am passionate, I will swear – they are just words, grow up.

If you are reading this and can say you are honestly content, please leave, this isn’t for you.

Right now they are gone let’s get a few things straight. Content – the most god awful word I have come across, it tells me two things; 1 – You don’t dream big enough, 2 – You lack drive.

Be the person striving for more, pushing yourself till it hurts, finding the limits you’ve set yourself and breaking them down.

I decided who I was going to be, I even went as far as to make a plan, a plan I have fought for, suffered for, that sure as shit was never going to be easy and I am god damn happy that it wasn’t, a plan that does not have an end and has requirements where failure or becoming ‘content’ will take everything from me.

I sit here looking at a sheet of paper, a sheet that in essence says ‘step 4 – Tick’. I don’t take more pride than that in it, it is the sum of three years and hundreds of hours, but to me it is just another bullet point. So was the £450 qualification handled in two weeks, or the few thousand hours of training and studying, even the accredited masters that requires a bank loan.

We all have something we want out of life, but we look at the road it takes to get there and shudder, the idea of sacrifice or hardship terrifies us, and so content seems like a suitable plan B. Let me say something that will get a scorn expression from many – fuck content, fuck your fear. I have had my own hell and hardships, there are moments that I would give anything to fix or get rid of from memory, but my goal, my dream requires so much god damn more. State your dream, wait no, let’s really do this –

Right now, say your dream, in 5 words or less – Might be a job/place/mood/ anything.

Next, state the minimum of what it’ll take to get there – cost/ hours/ ears/ qualifications

Now, and take this part seriously, are you brave enough? Could you take that on and accept the struggle that entails? Let us be very serious, if you look at it now, before even the first damn step in that direction and can’t say with certainty you are willing, when those moments come around that bring you to tears, that keep you awake at night, that lose you friends, to accept that this is all part of the plan, then don’t even start, and get really fucking familiar with – content.

Oh and if I need validation –

– Every damn friend I lost

– The hundreds of hours needed just to change appearance

– The tens of thousands of pounds for my qualifications

– The utter failure come competition day

– The loneliness for 3 years

– The laughter and judging

– The five years of work to just get my foot in the door

– The agony every fucking day

– The scars, history to overcome

and the rest of it that frankly if you need to hear, you were never going to be convinced anyway.

Be brave because in reality, if you aren’t living for those dreams, what is the damn point?

Aspire to Inspire.

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I am here.

NO IT’S NOT FITNESS. Just so you don’t close it right away. Anyway, moving forwards.

If you came to a 7 foot wall, what would your first thought be? A way around it I’m sure. But that isn’t an option. So option two, you look for a hand up. Nobody there. At least for now. So lets assume by some miracle, gruelling effort and personal strength you make it over the wall after god knows how long, what’s next? Most people say if you are good at something never do it for free. Well in some circumstance that would be true, but to me, if you are good at something, you have an obligation to help others with that experience. 

Getting over that wall is my experience, therefore I believe I have an obligation to others to help get them over it. 

NO IT IS NOT AN ACTUAL WALL.

We all face obstacles in life, some more extreme than others, higher walls as it were. So sometimes we need a leg up, or at least somebody behind us if we fall. 

I came across my own obstacles which I am unafraid to share, plenty of them in fact. If you are reading this you are either one of my subscribers (so much love to all of you) or you are one of my Facebook friends (assuming I had the balls to share this, so be kind). It’ll be very easy to laugh me off and frankly that is fine by me, I am not here for approval.

I am here as that leg up, or just a voice to guide or an ear to vent. Everything I went through I wished I had that hand up, it was one of two times in my life I prayed. Sadly I never got it. Without that I found my own way over the wall and I promised myself no matter what, if I came across the chance to help anyone else in any situation I would take it.

So whatever you are coming across, no matter how well you know me, all I am saying is: 

I am here. 

 

Aspire to Inspire. 

Dieting: A Rant.

You ever go out with a bunch of people for dinner when you’re dieting? Isn’t that a fucked up situation? Let’s say you’re at a table with seven people and everyone’s ordering their food. You’re at the end so you’re ordering last. They’re getting ribs, chicken strips, spaghetti, and whatever. No one in the group cares what they’re ordering. The conversation stays the same. Then it comes to you and your first question is, “How do you prepare your chicken breasts?”

People start looking at you.

Then you order two plain chicken breasts with a side of broccoli with no butter or seasoning. The waiter writes it down and off he goes to the kitchen. Now everyone’s looking at you like you’re a freak. They didn’t care that your other friend was eating ribs. They didn’t say shit when the guy ordered his chicken strips. So how is your meal selection any different?

It blows my mind. If you ordered something that was complete shit, no one would say anything. But because you ordered something to help you achieve a goal, it’s a problem. And now for the next ten minutes you’re having that stupid fucking conversation.

“It’s so easy for you to lose weight,” they say. “I can’t do it.”

And you’re thinking, really? Here I am at a Steakhouse ordering two plain chicken breasts and broccoli — which is gonna cost me 20 quid by the way — and it’s easy? This is something I want to do? You think I want to sit here and watch you fuckers eat wings and ribs? I’m here for your company, not to give you dieting tips you’re not gonna listen to.

Rant over. 

Aspire to Inspire.

Reality of Eating Disorders

First – The reason I share this – I’ve been there, i’ve been through my share of dark places, and a few other shares. I know the pain and I know the struggle. the lack of information I had was part of my downfall, so here’s me sharing some info condensed. It gets better, I promise. 

What are they?

Most people at some point feel a need to lose a bit of weight or get a bit fitter, or to comfort eat after a bad day. When these feelings are so common that they become a major part of somebody’s life, there may be an eating disorder. Medically recognised eating disorders, such as anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa are the extreme end of eating problems that can start simply, and get more and more complicated until they control or dominate a person’s life.
A wide range of issues can trigger an eating problem. Often a person feels that they have very little control of the events going on around them and eating problem can make them feel more in control.
An eating disorder can leave a person with a very low self-esteem and a distorted body image. They can lead to depression, and even at place someone at risk of suicide or self-harm. Eating disorders can also damage people’s bodies, sometimes with tragic consequences.

Facts

• Anyone can develop an eating disorder, although most likely it will occur in young women aged 15 to 25.
• Over 1.1 million people in the UK are directly affected by an eating disorder
• Recent research of young people in Scottish secondary schools showed that 68% recognise anorexia as a mental health problem. Only 9% considered someone will an eating disorder to be attention seeking
•Girls and women are 10 times more likely than boys and men to suffer from anorexia or bulimia
• Eating disorders affect 1 fifteen-year-old girl in every 150 and 1 fifteen-year-old boy in
every 10004

Signs and Symptoms

Anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa are described here, but it is important to consider that the lines between these problems are blurred, and indeed many people exhibit symptoms of both or either without meeting the precise definition.

Anorexia Nervosa

People with anorexia nervosa avoid eating and lose a lot of weight. They are usually at least 15% below their recommended body weight for their height, and often feel fat, even when they are very thin.

• People with anorexia nervosa have an extreme fear of gaining weight: they feel fat, even when they have lost so much weight that it becomes obvious to others.
• They may starve themselves by only eating tiny quantities of food.
• They can become so preoccupied with their weight and shape, and so distorted in their thinking about food, that it is very difficult for them to accept the need to eat a proper diet.
• They remain fascinated with food and often enjoy cooking for others.
• They often hide food and follow very complicated plans to avoid food and appear heavier than they really are.
• Sometimes they may pretend to have eaten when they have not.
• They may exercise vigorously, use laxatives or make themselves sick in order to lose more weight.
• A girl’s periods may stop or never even start.

Bulimia Nervosa

People with bulimia nervosa eat large amounts of food in ‘binges’ and then make themselves sick, or take laxatives to get rid of the food (purge).
• They may not look overweight or underweight, and because of this their eating problems are often difficult to detect. In fact, they can have great difficulty in controlling their eating – sometimes strictly dieting, at other times giving way to periods of binging.
• The food people eat in a binge is often high in calories, fat, or carbohydrate. As a person begins to fill full, feelings of shame and guilt can overwhelm them. It is those feelings that can trigger the need to purge.
• Continuous binging and vomiting can do serious harm to the body. Frequent weight changes can lead to loss of energy, mood changes and loss of interest in sex. Being sick regularly can result in dehydration, bad breath and serious damage to teeth. Regular use of laxatives can lead to severe bowel disease. Serious imbalances in any of the body’s essential minerals can result in organ failure and even death.

Recovery

• Recovery means different things to different people and no two individual journeys of recovery will be the same. Regardless of symptoms or past experiences, people with mental health problems should be given every opportunity to, and can, lead fulfilling and satisfying lives.
• Recovery from eating disorders can take a long time, and it is common for a person to experience setbacks before achieving a full recovery. Nevertheless, many people do recover completely.
• Eating disorders develop relatively slowly, with the behaviours involved emerging, and becoming more complicated as time passes. It is important for a person’s recovery that they get appropriate support as soon as possible, as once behaviours become ingrained, they can be very hard to alter.
• Treatment for eating disorders can take many forms, including inpatient and outpatient care from hospital teams, treatment from GPs, and support in the community. Other professionals like dieticians and occupational therapists may form part of a care team. Some people find self-help groups useful.
• The support of family and friends is very important to recovery, and if you are supporting someone with an eating disorder, you should look up information from specialist organisations to support you and your friend/relative.

Stigma and Eating Disorders

• Eating disorders are often intensely private, and hidden from view. When it becomes clear that something is wrong, people often get cruel comments, and a lack of understanding from people who do not have adequate information to be supportive.
• People’s stigmatising reactions to mental ill health vary. Sometimes stigma is motivated by fear of the unknown, such as in schizophrenia. For eating disorders, one of the most important aspects to the stigma is disgust.
• Because the consequences of eating problems are often visible, onlookers often find it so hard to feel any empathy or understanding with the behaviour that they react by stigmatising.
• Verbal abuse, or comment is very common. Often people are called names, or their appearance is remarked upon. This abuse comes from friends, family, and even passers by in the street. This type of stigma is especially damaging because eating disorders are so closely linked to body image and self-esteem, the main targets of comments.
• The term “anorexic” has started to become a common adjective to describe very slim people, which can lead to a misunderstanding of what it is really like to have anorexia nervosa.

Myths and Misunderstandings

• Eating disorders are often described as a modern day problem, arising from the catwalk culture of the last thirty years. Although images in the media have been shown to influence some people’s body image, clinically significant eating disorders were first described by Physician and Minister John Reynolds in 1669 and Philosopher Thomas Hobbes in 1688.
• Eating disorders are sometimes dismissed as phases or fads, not serious and something that a person will just grow out of. Eating disorders have many long-term physical and psychological consequences. Anorexia nervosa carries a 13% mortality rate, from physical complications and suicide.
• Eating disorders are often thought of as middle class attention seeking behaviour, something that wilful teenagers do, that could be sorted by eating properly for a few weeks. This is not the case. Eating disorders are very complicated, deeply held routines that for the person involved seem like a perfectly logical way of coping with a difficult situation by controlling one aspect of life. Returning to a more conventional relationship with food may take years, and careful support.

 

Aspire to Inspire. 

 

Stopped myself.

I was about to go on a massive rant, in fact I did but I have deleted the whole thing. In essence, if you do not approve of my lifestyle – GO AWAY. Nobody needs to hear your opinions, my success should not be a negative topic to be shared. Sort your shit out and then get back to me. 

‘Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you’.

 

Aspire to Inspire. 

Trying to have a voice.

https://www.facebook.com/PBMoriginal  – My sports-person page 

http://instagram.com/c_j_barney  – My journey on Instagram

https://www.facebook.com/Barney667 – My own personal Facebook

https://callumbarney.wordpress.com/ – This Blog

https://twitter.com/BarneysFitness     – Twitter Feed

5 pages – Daily updates trying to do my part. 5 pages of free advice, unpaid work, edited photos and videos, pages upon pages of text that goes without comment but piles on the followers and views. Few occasions in which feedback is received. YET, it continues. I will keep on working without considerable thanks because that isn’t what I do this for. I do this for a better life – not mine, but yours. I have been through points in life where I dreamt and wished for a hand up in the world. So I told myself if the day ever came when it passed, if the misery in my mind lifted, I would do anything and everything in my power to take this pain from the lives of others. The only way I know how to help is to offer it, to offer advice, experience, knowledge, motivation, resources, time and anything else I can.

 

Aspire to Inspire. 

Getting it right.

Life is made up of a set of categories, those are down to you. For me, those are family, friends, fitness, psychology, travel and my girlfriend. This is just me being proud rather than being that much of a help to others today, sorry. 

As far as I’m concerned, I need nothing more, it doesn’t need to be more complicated than that. Now this is where it gets good, 6 categories, that’s all I have or want. So how is that going? Pretty exceptionally. Somehow I am the lucky bastard who has it all, maybe that’s because ‘ALL’ for me doesn’t form a very long list. 

Family – Very little choice involved, but you do have the choice to learn from them, to do right by them and to care for them. I have that, undoubtedly. Granted they don’t know me all that well and we don’t always get along. But it doesn’t matter, I have them to be so god damn grateful for. A brother who introduced me to fitness and inspired me, a father who taught me incredible work ethic, and a mother who taught me selfless care for others. Pretty valuable lessons. 

Friends – I never kept this list particularly long either. Maybe 10, probably less. But my god I adore these people, I keep a small group of incredible people and I wouldn’t have it any other way. One or two have been around for years and have to some degree saved me, one in particular and he will know who he is. 

Fitness – Okay granted, 2 years working with this one makes it pretty new. But that doesn’t matter, it’s changed my life and is now a large part of who I am. Thanks to fitness I have transformed my life for the better. Now fitter, faster, stronger, leaner, healthier and all round physically better to the degree I am quite exceptional in many fields. Also the mental aspects involved, confidence, dedication, commitment, perseverance, organisation and so god damn much more. Fitness of all sorts has more lessons to teach and a far more hands on approach in teaching them than any classroom I have sat in. 

Psychology – Its a pretty broad one. By psychology I mean the ability to council, to help others, to understand people, to learn, basically all the aspects involved. thanks to my personal work, degree and the placement I have been involved in, this is constantly growing, allowing me to better myself and hopefully the lives of others.  

Travel – A whole world out there and I am getting to see it. Yes there is so much more to see still, but that isn’t the point. 21 years old and I’ve visited 14 countries on countless trips. I am lucky enough to be able to do this and still fit it into my life. Experiences and memories most people couldn’t dream of. 

My girlfriend – A new category of my life. People who know me will know I am damn independent. I learnt not to rely on others and to be me without need of approval. Now not to say this has changed, but maybe just developed. This girl, (yes I leave names out for anonymity of others) isn’t changing me, rather improving my life. I get to be me again, openly and unapologetically, because she accepts me for me (well more than that I think she kinda likes it too). I couldn’t ask for more from a person. Not only that but she is pretty god damn incredible, frankly, the dream girl. 

 

So yeah, all in all I would say I am getting it right, somehow. Through so much hard work, struggles and some serious hardships, I have reached the other end of it, where everything is now going my way. I am amazingly grateful. 

 

Aspire to Inspire.